Procrastination is my middle name….it’s on my birth certificate….

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December 3, 2012 by Lisa Lou

Our kids went back to school today, and though I’m sure it was a very difficult day, it was the first of many that will lead to some semblance of normalcy. I’m not going to dwell on the subject, because quite frankly, it depresses me. I hope that all of my teacher friends made it through the day without too much difficulty, and all the students came home with at least a vague realization that their teachers really do care about them and each other. I love our school district, I really do.

I did nothing today. Not one thing. I used to go through long bouts of what would probably be considered depression once winter showed its ugly face. I do not spend much time outside once the temperature drops and I guess the lack of vitamin D is what reeks so much havoc on my mood. It’s been awhile since I’ve had one of these little episodes, but today kind of reminded me of them. I lounged around on the couch and did nothing. I didn’t even watch TV. I read for a while, played around on Pinterest and Facebook and napped….A LOT.

I probably should have been cleaning the house and doing the shit-ton of laundry I have piled around, but I didn’t. I don’t even feel that guilty about it. It’s not like it won’t be there tomorrow. (And quite possibly the day after that, if I don’t get myself out of this funk by tomorrow.) That’s the beauty of housework. It never, EVER, goes away. Even if you do it, it still has to be done tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that.

I have to tell you that I almost died again today. And no, it wasn’t by way of maniac truck driver. We live in the real and true middle of nowhere. Because of this we have an emergency light. It’s actually just a street light, but because there isn’t a street, it’s called an emergency light. Don’t ask me why, ask the electric company. Anyway, this light goes out from time to time and I hate it. It puts us in total darkness and I do not like it, Sam I am.

While I do not spend my time crying over sad movies, I do spend quite a bit of it scaring myself silly watching horror movies. I’ve seen them all. I love them. I don’t know why, but it’s a genre that I’ve always enjoyed. When I was a kid, my brother and his friend snuck “The Children of the Corn” into our house on VHS. My mother didn’t allow us to watch that type of film, so we had to watch it when she wasn’t home. It scared me. To death. Yet, as soon as I could sleep through the night without waking in a cold sweat from night terrors, I watched it again. And again. And again. That’s where it started, and I’ve been hooked ever since.

Anyway, because I watch so many “Don’t go upstairs!” and “The killer is in the house!” movies, I have a tendency to scare myself, needlessly. Tonight, I had to run to the store just after dark. As I was walking to the truck the emergency light went out. That alone is enough to get my heart pumping, so I quickened my pace, hopped into the truck and locked the doors. Safe.

I got a mile down the road, still quite in the middle of nowhere, and something hit my shoulder. Hard. Now, I don’t know about you, but I’ve watched probably right around 1,007 movies where the killer is not in the house at all, but he’s in the back seat with garrote in hand waiting to choke the unsuspecting stupid blonde to death. My heart stopped. Like I’m pretty sure it stopped ticking. I slammed on the brakes, threw on the lights and frantically scanned the back seat with hand already on the handle that would open the door to put distance between me and the serial killer psycho in the back. (I’m not gonna lie, I thought the Sam’s Club killer had finally tracked me down.)

Not a killer in sight. I was still kind of panicked on accounta something very real had hit my shoulder. At this point I was over serial killer movies, and on to ghost stories and sci-fi. Nary a ghost to be found. I did, however, find a pair of sunglasses that had previously been resting in the visor above my head. Huh. Mystery solved. Heart pumping blood once again. Hey, I’ve told you guys, I have a tendency to be overly dramatic.

I have yet to tell you about the benefit and I definitely will tomorrow. As for now, I’d better throw in some laundry or I’ll have a very unhappy family come morning. :)



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